Lessons learned...the hard way

So I am still here in Ping Quan and I have learned a few more things about Chinese culture. China is in every way completely opposite from South America, and because South America is the only thing I can compare my international experience to, it gets me into a lot of trouble.

Showing Affection
Latin Americans are very loving and physically affectionate. They kiss and hug EVERY person they meet, and as their love for you increases so does their physical manifestation of it. I had been in Ping Quan for a week and one of the students’ mothers took me to go find a bag for my laptop. We ran all over the whole city and she was so kind to me, she bought me good treats and always made sure that I didn’t get hit by a car. We found the perfect bag and then she brought me back to Cui Guo Hua’s learning center. I wanted to show that I appreciated her and that I considered her my friend so I did what any good Latin American would do; I hugged her. That was a HUGE mistake. I thought she was going to die and I am sure she felt the same way. I made her so uncomfortable. She had no idea how to respond to that. I asked Cui Guo Hua about it later and he said that he wouldn’t even hug his mother. Nobody touches each other here. When I am playing games with the children and I need to whisper in their ear, they won’t get close to me. Their personal space is huge.

Always Refuse
There is a practice in China of always refusing when anything is offered to you. I went with Cui Guo Hua to his friend’s house during the first week that I was in Ping Quan and they brought plates of nuts and fruit into the room. Using my South American savvy got me in to trouble again in this situation. In South America, if you are offered something you accept it gratefully to show respect to your guest. It is rude to refuse something offered to you, most especially food. Cui Guo Hua’s friend offered us oranges. I did not want one as I was not hungry; so I pretended I did not understand the offer (which was in Chinese, but was accompanied by a very obvious gesture). Cui Guo Hua had peeled his orange and then translated and said, do you want this orange, not wanting to seem rude to his friends, yet still not really wanting to eat a whole orange I said I would take some of the one he was eating. This was a trick I used all the time on my mission. It saved me from having to accept huge portions of food but also allowed me to remain in the good graces of my host. I tool part of his orange and the friend said something to Cui Guo Hua, and they laughed and said “American”; one of the few words I could recognize in Chinese. I asked Cui Guo Hua what he said and he told me that his friend commented on how “free” I was. Meaning, it was very odd to them, and a little rude that I accepted the offer of an orange on the first offering. You see, people in China always refuse even if they would really like to accept. They will finally give in when pressed, but will not accept the first offer. Even the little children are taught this. A little girl brought a bag of candy to class and offered it to her classmates; they all said no! These are nine year olds refusing candy!! She pressed and pressed and they finally all said yes. I took a picture with a little three year old in a restaurant and then had it developed and gave it to her. She was so delighted she jumped up and down squealing and showing every one in the restaurant. After she had circulated around the restaurant she brought the picture back and gave it to me. I told her in Chinese that it was hers and gave it back to her. She looked at it again and handed it back to me. Again, I gave it to her and asked Cui Guo Hua to tell her that it was for her. She handed it back and told him, “ I am a good girl, I don’t take it.” I asked Cui Guo Hua what I could say so that she would take it. He told her mother that if the child did not take it, I would think it was rude. Her mother told her to take the photo and she took it and bounced away.

I will include more cultural differences later...For now I wanted to tell you that I got to name a whole room full of new students. So far my class includes Susan, Alicia, Teresa, Laura, Steven, Nathan, Jacob and Blake from the family and a Heather and Ashley. I can only name them names that other foreign teachers can easily recognize even with awful pronunciation and that the students can say and remember.


This is Alicia
















This is Laura








These are a bunch of kids from one of my classes. The little girl with the scarf on that is sitting in front is named Megan and is a true tomboy. She came to my room on Saturday and invited me to "play." Once we got outside she showed me that she had a bunch of firecrackers that she proceeded to light. Through a mixture of peer pressure and a total inability to communicate I found myself, led by Megan of course, racing unsupervised through the streets of Ping Quan, her on roller skates, me on foot, throwing lit firecrackers at people. I gave her the rest of mine and she climbed on top of a roof and threw them at unsuspecting pedestrians. Oh the life of an 11 year old rural Chinese girl.